I'm referring to the parents of children with severe cases of depression or other mood disorders, ADHD, psychosis, autism, and other emotional and/or cognitive disorders.
Previous research has not done enough to educate us about the effects on parents of having a child with SN.
Have you ever wondered why parents of kids with special needs always seem to be so cranky? Another person with good intentions said, “G-d only gives us what we can handle.” 13.
Or why we tend to make really inappropriate remarks so often? And even if we did choose to become a special needs family through adoption, there are still plenty of reasons to be cranky – and then joke about it later. The rest of the coffee was dumped on the kitchen floor and eaten by an ecstatic child yesterday before it could be fully cleaned up. Mixed the g-tube formula, fed daughter, cleaned up, got to school on time, then listened to the neighbor complaining that her 8 year old refused to eat broccoli at dinner last night. Was up with a wide-awake child from 2am to 6am, then awakened by a phone call at am. It was the pharmacy leaving a voice mail explaining that the medication refill will cost 0 out-of-pocket. 90 minute screaming meltdown 3 times per week – and we’re overdue for one, so it’ll probably be today. While signing school papers, two kids were talking directly into each ear. The child with a disability brushed his own teeth, dressed himself and tied his shoes while his able sibling refused to brush teeth, refused to get dressed and rolled on the ground instead of putting on shoes. Had to decline a bunch of invitations to weddings and family reunions again this year. You may have seen her sneaking into the volunteer lounge for ice cream or being pushed into the cheese pit by laughing children.
I love children, and am not at all put off by special challenges. But a person really has to consider what they are getting involved with when they date someone with a child, let alone a special needs child.
I would hope that the OP does NOT get flamed for asking this. If they are not up for the challenge and adventure, then they should just move on and keep looking, but if they want to be involved it is a great experiance.
Among the research that does exist, it is often diagnosis-specific.
For example, Johnston and Mash (2005) concluded that the presence of a child with ADHD results in increased problems with family and marital functioning (hello!
It will be life changing if I choose him as a partner, for me and my kids.I would leave that part out of it completely..them later after you have dated a few times and feel they are the type that wouldn't turn tail and run.Then let them meet her when/if the relationship gets to that point.To begin, there is no strict or clear definition of what it means for a child to have “special needs.” Many people think of special needs as necessarily involving a serious or chronic medical condition.When it comes to these parents, it is clear that the additional demands on parents of chronically ill children cause stress that affects the whole family (Cousino and colleagues, 2013).